Additional Thoughts

1. I am so sick and tired of Power Polls or NFL Rankings. This isn't the retarded and backward NCAA football we are talking about. I don't care where Peter King, the person who calls himself DR. Z, who I will just call Mr. Irrelevant, ESPN, or any other website ranks NFL teams. As Mike Golic would say. Stop it. Just Stop it. Fill your pages with something more meaningful.

2. With respect to the retarded NCAA football, could someone with a real voice make the argument that a non-playoff NCAA football championship actually makes the regular season LESS important. Here is the simple argument. Do we care what happens to Penn State now? They aren't getting into the BCS Title game, THUS EACH AND EVERY ONE OF THEIR REMAINING REGULAR SEASON GAMES IS MEANINGLESS. And that's the weakest example. What about the 90% of teams who lose a game or more within the first 4 weeks of the regular season? Your telling me that Ohio State is still playing meaningful games with 2 losses? Or worse that Michigan has played a single meaningful game this year? Basically the BCS system makes the regular season important for about 5-8 teams each year. And as we approach the end of the year, that number gets further whittled down, to about 2-4. To the contrary, an 8 team playoff would allow the 1 and 2 loss teams of the world to play meaningful games even in October and November. If I hear one more moron make the argument that a playoff system would hurt the regular season I am going to scream. Please somebody make this counter-argument!!!!!

3. Lastly, the Giants Lincecum just won the Cy Young Award. Only about 2 months since the last day he played a game of baseball. Way to stay relevant baseball.

Tuesday Morning Thoughts: Execrable Commercials

This image resulted from a Goggle images search of "Best Commercials". I concur. Although today, the young Cindy Crawford would be called a plus sized model. Alright, this week's TMT theme? Terrible commercials and advertisements.

1. The Bud Light "Drinkability" commercials. No its not taste I'm after, I'm just looking for a really drinkable drink. You know the kind of substance that is fluid and can be digested without chewing. A drink that is kind of like water because water is drinkable.

2. Every Coors commercial that I've seen. I think Coors is trying to set the record for number of ways you can innovate a can/bottle. We've got the "vent" can, the "the mountain's will turn blue when its cold bottle", and the best one ever "we transport our beer in an ice train" so it stays cold during transportation commercials. Never mind that the beer lays warm in the retail store before its sold. Anyway, I think what Coors is really trying to get across is the following: "Listen- our beer sucks, but our can's are pretty cool".

3. The Bulls Love it Live marketing campaign. To be truthful, the Ads should say, "Listen the Bulls suck, but we got the best acrobats, fat men dancing, ugliest cheerleaders, and a donut race". P.S. This is why I don't pay anymore to attend Bulls games. Its nauseating how much extra crap they're trying to shower us with. Here's a thought, how about you dazzle me with great basketball, instead of the Chinese bowl acrobat lady.

4. I saw this commercial this morning and found it funny. Word for word, "Lipozene is not for people who want to lose weight, its for people who want to lose pounds of fat".

5. The Bears still run Ads marketing that "single game tickets are on sale". Never mind that all single game tickets were sold-out on July 17th, 5 minutes after they went on sale. So the Bears are paying money for advertisements for a product that doesn't even exist. Kind of like how Bears fans have been paying money for a product that doesn't really exist.

Random Thoughts.

6. MLB still hasn't dished out the Cy Young(s), best manager, and other major awards. I'm not even sure they've given out the MVP award. Is this their attempt to stay relevant almost a month after the season ends? Baseball should take a lesson from real sports and issue these awards when they are relevant (i.e. the post-season). Why is baseball so f'n backward? People stopped paying attention to the sport when it was decided that the Phillies and Rays would go to the World Series. Should we now care who is going to win the Cy Young in November? Move on.

7. Saginasty Bags ( co-contributor to this website, although he doesn't contribute), is a Lions fan. Yesterday, he e-mailed me and poked fun of how soft Kyle Orton was because he needed a cart when he hurt his ankle against the Lions. His argument was that he was at the game and all the Lions fans were shocked about his low pain tolerance. As I pointed out to him yesterday, his logic is so irrelevant and flawed that I couldn't possibly respond to Orton's pain tolerance threshold issues. Instead, I list the Lions past and present QBs:. Joey Harrington ( I should stop here, but...) John Kitna, Mike McMahon, Orlovsky, Josh McNown, Rodney Peete, Charlie Batch, Scott Mitchell, Stony Case, Frank Reich, Dan Majkowski, and now, Daunte Cullpeper and Drew Stanton. Brilliant. I actually think this group is worse than the Bears history of QBs. At least Jim McMahon won a SB and people have heard of our hall of fame QB, Sid Luckman.

8. I had dinner with my wife's co-workers, who happen to be gay. Not that there is anything wrong with that, to steal a Seinfeld Quote. But, when gay men make lewd dick jokes, it's not funny. Its creepy and makes things rather uncomfortable if your straight. Again, not that there is anything wrong with that.

9. I love how some people claimed that making fun of President Bush or rejecting his arguments was somehow unpatriotic, but that making fun of Barack Obama and his message of hope and change is somehow good for the country. Jump aboard people, if he fails (which is a possibility) we might be making counterfeit Rolex watches and selling them to people in China and India.

10. Tony Kornheiser is the worst MNF commentator not named Dennis Miller, ever. Tony stop asking Jaws questions about football. I believe that the person commenting about a football game should know the game, instead of asking his co-commentators about whether such and such play was really a penalty or whether Shaun Hill is a good QB.

Done.

Chicago Bears vs. Titans: The Final Chapter on Rex Grossman

My great friend, lets call him Grizzly b/c he's a hairy one, text messaged me after the game, "If Orton played, we beat the Titans!". For the first time in the Grossman era, I had to agree with him: If Orton's in the game, I think we got a chance to beat the best team (record wise) in football. Which says something about how far Orton has come, but is really a damming conclusion on how terrible Rex Grossman is. But Grossman's performance wasn't the only reason for the Bears loss. Let us examine.

1. Grossman is just too small to become an elite QB in this league. Unlike Orton who can see the entire field, Grossman has to find throwing lanes between tall lineman to make passes. So instead of seeing 70% of the field, Grossman's height automatically reduces his field of vision to around 30-40%. That's a lot of "he didn't see the linebacker or safety and he just threw a terrible interception" type plays. Even worse, Grossman's confidence is ground-low (opposite I think of sky high). He looks scared and lost out there sometimes. Almost as if he needs a big hug. I've been the biggest Grossman backer, but now even I have to admit, Grossman's career is done in Chicago. I wish him the best of luck in the future. But as for this book? I'm done reading it.

2. I'm going to sound like a Jay Marriotti column when I say this next paragraph. (I.e. I've said this comment about 20 times already and will repeat the same theme again and again.). But, the Bears defensive line is just terrible. Think about the QBs we've made look like Pro-Bowlers. Brian Griese, Matt Ryan, John Kitna, Orlovsky, Guss Ferrotte, and now Kerry Collins. We stopped the run. But, we also gave up 290 passing yards and 2 passing TDs yesterday. Kerry Collins looked as if he was the 3rd little piggy chilling in his brick house. He had all day to make plays. No pressure from Alex Brown or Ogunleye. Even worse, when we did send extra blitzes, we STILL couldn't get to the QB. There is no reason that you can't get to the QB, when you send Briggs, Brown and Urlacher on a blitz. What kind of blitzes are we calling Babich? For what seems like the 9 straight game, the Bears couldn't get to the QB.

3. Our offense finally started to pick things up when we went into the no huddle offense late in the 4th quarter. But why did it take us so long to get into it? Its worked the past 8 games for Orton, why didn't we go too it sooner?

4. The bright spots of the game? Forte still looks great. He had over 100 yards running/receiving and scored a TD. Urlacher finally showed up yesterday and made a lot of plays stopping the run. Greg Olsen had a few nice plays. Devin Hester looks to be excelling as a WR. If Grossman doesn't overthrow Hester on that deep throw, DH has got a 60 yard plus TD.

5. Goats (besides Grossman and entire DL?) : Charles Tillman for repeatedly giving his man the come back route. Vasher for getting schooled by Justin f'n Gage. Kevin Payne for having no impact on the game (sorry, I don't buy into the Payne hype machine). Lastly, Lovie Smith, Turner and Babich for not coaching poorly (they did an okay job), but failing to out-coach the opposing team.

Chicago Bears Mid-Season Report: Where's Brian Urlacher?

Its time for the Bears Mid-Season Report. At 5-3, the Bears are about 1 game over where I predicted them to be this year. (Remember I had them going 8-8 this season.) So needless to say, I'm pretty happy, the Bears are better than I thought they were (Again, thanks Coach Green). But let's delve into it a little more.

First, ask yourself is this team a Superbowl team? I don't care about playoffs, winning the division, etc., unless it means at least a trip to the big game. Right now the Bears are sub-par playoff team that can't run against 8 man fronts and can't rush the passer on defense. Its a pessimistic view. But, at least I'm being honest. When I think of the 2008 Bears, I think average, okay, better than expected. That's a recipe for a 1st round exit.

But, I am being a little too harsh. Because of teams like the Giants and the Steelers, its become less an less important to be great during weeks 4-10. To the contrary, all that really matters is being great in weeks 18, 19, and 20 (i.e. the postseason). The Superbowl Bears' team un-led by Grossman were great in weeks 2-6, but were only above average during the playoffs and Superbowl game. So what am I really saying here? Well just because we're playing okay now, doesn't mean that we can' t be great later on. Hey, if the Giants can do it, why can't we?

Back to reality and the offense. Orton's been pretty darn good. Forte is a breath of fresh air. Our WRs are okay, but still getting it done. Overall, the offense gets a solid B+.

Defense you ask? Well, lets get back on point. Where in the worl d is Brian Urlacher? He's got that new great contract, but isn't playing like a great middle line backer. I judge my Chicago sports's hero's on championships. MJ, the GOLD STANDARD, won about 4 championships before he really cashed in. Even better, after getting paid the big bucks, he still delivered 2 more banners. Now that's greatness. Urlacher? He used to be great. Unfortunately, he's just solid now. Of course, to be fair, its a lot tougher to be great in your 30s in football, than it is in basketball.

Put simply, our best defensive player, really isn't our best defensive player. Briggs and Tommie Harris took that mantle over. They're at the thanksgiving adults' table with Orton and Forte, while Urlacher, Grossman, Vasher, Kreutz, and Ogunleye are stuck eating chicken fingers at the kids' table.

Overall, the Bears defense isn't getting it done. They've been good stopping the run, but awfull at stoping the pass. Its okay to get away with that when you face QBs like Brian Griese, Matt Ryan, John Kitna, and Orlolvsky, but what happens when we play Eli Manning, Romo, or even McNabb again (and they're not even that great). Overall, the defense's mid-season grade is a C.

Let's hope the Bears start studying like they're about to take the Bar exam. To win it all, we need A's.

Tuesday Morning Thoughts: Election Day

Our theme for this Tuesday? Elections. Here we go.

1. Who's mentally insufficient, rude, lazy, and has no sense of time? The guy working your local election day polling place. As George Costanza couldn't say, "We'll, oh yeah, the mental hospital called, and evidently they're out of retards".

2. If I had to elect the hardest hitting team in football, hands down I would vote for the Pittsburgh Steelers defense. Both teams in fact (Redskins) we're just laying pipe down last night on MNF. If I was playing the Steelers defense, I would have faked some kind of injury.

3. Lets see Judge X is up for election. I have no idea who Judge X is. But whew, I really like his last name. It must be irish. Wheww. I'll vote for him.

4. If I had to elect the most incompetent head coaches in the NFL, I would vote for one of the following people. The guy who's now coaching the raiders, Rod Marinelli and Herman Edwards. I'm pretty sure I vote Edwards.

5. If I had a vote as to who we trade from the Bulls and the nominees are: Luol Deng, Ben Gordon, Kirk Hinrich, and Larry Hughes. I would elect to trade all of them. Luol Deng scored 1 point last night. One f'n point.

6. If I could vote for the worst fantasy football team ever, I would vote for the Fantasy Club (F.C.) Goners.

7. If I could vote for the best alternative sports related website, (not including this one of course), I vote for the Big Lead, simply because of their babe pictures.

8. If I could vote for best mainstream sports related website? I vote SI.com. They got Extra Mustard (see point 7 for a reason why), better writers (Sorry Scoop Jackson, I would rather read Mariotti), and just an easier layout. Plus, they don't have Scoop Jackson.

9. If I could vote for best .com writer and the nominees are: Bill Simmons, Reily, Peter King (ugh), and Jason Whitlock. I think I go Bill Simmons b/c the Patriots aren't good now. I still like a little Whitlock every now and then. Reily is nice, but only once a week. Peter King sucks.

10. If I could vote for my all time Bears team, I would lineup the following players:
QB: Orton (Seriously, there is no one else. Maybe Erik Kramer? Grossman? McMahon really wasn't good. Sid L. was too old.
RB: Walter Peyton backed up by Neal Anderson. Sorry Sayres, I'm too young.
WR: Willie Gault (God we had shitty WRs also) and Marty Booker (Oh my lord, our best WRs are Willie Gault and MArty Booker.). Scratch that, I'll add Devin Hester instead.
DL: Richard Dent, Tommie Harris, Dan Hampton, Fred Washington.
LB: Briggs, Singletary, and Otis Wilson.
Crs: Vasher and Tillman (I just can't think of anyone else)
Safety: Mike Brown and Gary Fencik
K: Butler
P: Maynard

11. Bulls you ask? PG: Derrick Rose, SG: Michael Jordan, SF: Scottie Pippen, PF: Horace Grant, C: Cartwright, with my 6th man being, Kukoc. That was a whole lot easier.

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Chicago Bears: We're Bringing Rexy Back

He's back!!! I must admit, I am an out of the closet Rex Grossman fan. I was kind of happy he got a chance to play this year. Didn't you just have a sliver of hope that Grossman would miraculously become Bret Favre (the good Favre) for 2 quarters yesterday? Well he wasn't "the good Bret Favre", but he did engineer a comeback. It hurts to lose Orton now because he was playing very well. Let us hope we get the good Rexy and not the bad Grossman. Alright, on to the game thoughts.

1. You cannot, I repeat (for the 1000th time on this website) play the Cover 2 defense if you can't get pressure with your front four. The Bears can't get pressure with the D-line, yet are still playing the Cover 2. Its terrible. Babich and Lovie, get out of your love making with the Cover 2 and start attacking the Quarterback. There is absolutely no reason we should sit back in a soft zone and let Orlovsky pick us apart. Stop it. Just stop it.

2. On that note, isn't it time we call out Ogunleye, Mark Anderson and Alex Brown? Enough with the Tommie Harris bashing. He's playing fine. If you want to get real pressure on the QB, you've got to get an outside pass rush. At the very least, get enough outside pressure to make the QB step up and possibly get sacked by your interior lineman. You can't rely on your DTs to get sacks. It starts with the DE's. So far, they're not getting it done.

3. Ron Turner. I don't want to hate on you too much b/c your basically taking a below average offense and making them a pretty good offensive team (most points per game in the NFL). But, when Orton got hurt, you've got to protect your backup QB by running the rock with Forte. In the 3rd quarter you kept putting the ball in the hands of Grossman, who obviosly looked a little rusty. Give the ball to Forte. Thankfully, you came around in the 4th quarter and Forte started killing that Lions D.

4. A) Our special teams unit is not blocking anyone on kickoffs and B) Devin Hester doesn't remotely look 100% healthy. Worse, he's constantly fumbling the ball. That game isn't even close if Devin doesn't cough up that Kick Off in the 2nd Quarter.

5. Back to our defense. Its just not very good. What happened to Urlacher? He honestly hasn't made one big play this year. Not one. The Bears pay him like a HOF, but he's been playing like Larry Minter. Thankfully, Lance Briggs is playing some pretty darn good football. P.S. Steltz' pick of Orlovsky was beautiful.

Next Week: Its going to be a rough game against the Titans. They're great at taking away the run. Which means that Grossman is going to have to make some plays down the field. I actually like our chances against Tennessee, simply because we've played the run, better than the pass this year on defense. And Tennessee is going to do a whole lot of running.